While I was stuck for that rhyme, I did go ahead with a second verse. I also have a title. Inkling of what the 3rd verse might be.
Fierce Friend
Lift your hands to build a wall of thorn and bone
Rise up
Line your stomach with iron, sharpen your teeth on stone
Rise up
Bathe your tongue in acid, cover your eyes with chrome
Rise up
Set your hair on fire, make a whirlwind your throne
Rise up
Rise up
Drag me from the wreakage, blow your breath into my lungs
Rise up
Help me burn the bodies, help me hide the gun
Rise up
Steal us tickets on a fast ship, one that will really run
Rise up
Wrest the wheel from the pilot, set the controls for the sun
Rise up
Rise up
By our strength combined, we climb out of the gravity well
Rise up
2 comments:
This reminds me of one of those close up pictures where you can't recognize the object because it is so close.
When you posted just the first line I got a lonely desolate feel from it. Now that you've composed so more, it reads like a hymn, like something read to a crowd.
Anyway, very cool.
it reads like a hymn, like something read to a crowd
Cool! That's the feel I'm shooting for. I'm also happy it would feel right addressed to a group, or an individual. It's a love poem/song, but I want it to have that hymn quality.
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